Sometimes after I come out of something that was hard, I like to spend some time looking back and thinking about what God taught me through a rough situation. For example, we lived in northern Michigan for a hard 2 years. I didn’t see much joy at the time. But after moving away, I was able to look back and see specific reasons that God placed us there.
I lost my friend. My good friend Claudia recently lost her fight with colon cancer and is now in heaven. It was hard to watch her suffer the past few weeks and she left a pretty big hole in my life personally. I ache when I think of her husband and 2 sons who now face life without this amazing person. But as I move forward, I am going to try to put words together as I think through what I learned through all of this.
I lost my friend. My good friend Claudia recently lost her fight with colon cancer and is now in heaven. It was hard to watch her suffer the past few weeks and she left a pretty big hole in my life personally. I ache when I think of her husband and 2 sons who now face life without this amazing person. But as I move forward, I am going to try to put words together as I think through what I learned through all of this.
It ain’t over til it’s over.
Claudia was still doing kingdom work during the final couple of days of her life. She was boldly sharing Jesus with family and friends and openly praying for people in the room who don’t yet have a relationship with Christ. I don’t know what the end of my life will look like. Maybe it will be similar to hers or maybe I will spend 10 years in a nursing home into my 90’s or maybe it will happen in the blink of an eye. But through this I learned that no matter what my circumstances, I still have work to do. God will still use me if I am willing. I can never let myself become so self absorbed in my circumstances, that I miss opportunites for Him!
How will I handle it?
I think nothing says as much about a person’s heart as how they handle a really hard situation. Feeling like a very healthy person and being given a diagnosis of stage IV cancer? I would say that qualifies as such a test. From the day of her diagnosis, up until the final days, she showed a strength that most people would not exhibit. I’m not sure how a person without faith could ever be as “okay” with things if they were facing saying goodbye to their family, enduring a potentially painful ending, and “losing” the final 35 years of their life. I think that non-believers are always watching to see how Christians will handle things. If and when something truly hard happens to me, I want my faith to be evident to everyone. But not to say “look at me and how great of a Christian I am,” but to say “Wow. What an awesome God that gives that kind of strength and confidence!”
You never know.
In her own words, Claudia’s last week on earth was a gift. On oxygen and struggling to breath and swallow and sometimes speak, she was able to finish her business. Her extended family flew in and they had big dinners together, watched our church’s Easter service on a DVD together, shared lots of stories and memories and prayed together. She had very personal and important conversations with her husband and her sons. She gave pieces of jewelery that had special meaning to her neices. She wrote letters to be read at different milestones in her sons’ lives. As much pain as she increasingly was in, Claudia was able take care of business and she recognized this as a precious gift. Truth is I might not have that final week. A car jumps the curb tomorrow and I don’t get a week. That lesson smacked me square between the eyes and right in the gut. I need to live my life in such a way that if I don’t get that final week or month, I will have taken care of business. I need to be saying certain things to people right now! I think most of us don’t think about our mortality and foolishly believe we have plently of time to do things....someday.
My friend that I was at Jazzercize class with just 6 weeks ago is in heaven with Jesus at this very moment! Those aren’t just words to make you feel good or a cliche. That is absolute, amazing TRUTH. God promises that ALL THINGS work together for good to those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. ‘ALL THINGS’ might be really hard and painful things but when lessons can be learned and we can grow closer to Him as a result.....it IS good.
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
